And though I had slain a thousand foes less one,
The thousandth knife found my liver;
The thousandth enemy said to me,
'Now you shall die,
Now none shall know.'
And the fool, looking down, believed this,
Not seeing, above his shoulders, the naked stars,
Each one remembering.
--John M. Ford, The Final Reflection

The Asylum Director

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"The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this rested solely on my suspicion that I would never be fit for real work, and that writing didn't require any." - Russel Baker

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Finally!

Well, I’m back.

I’ve finally managed to land a job. It’s as a writer for iWebmasters. Now, as per my contract, I can’t tell anyone what it’s about or who the client is or what exactly I do but still, it isn’t too bad. Sure, the pay isn’t as good as I want it to be but still…I’m going to be paid to do what I do at home for free. Now, I’m still on probationary status and I won’t become a regular employee until after six months worth of proving myself that I can do it. I don’t think it’s going to be as bad as I think it is but if it isn’t, I’ll just remind myself that I signed a thrice-damned contract already. I’m stuck there for the remainder of it and I’ll just have to find some way to make the most of it and the work. Besides, since I’m writing, it’ll hopefully give me enough time to keep working on my non-work related writing, which is still high priority for me.

So, aside from that, what else is up with me? Well, for starters, I can’t believe I’m still managing to maintain some level of contact with my Ambergris friends. I’ve gotten used to not having them around anymore but that doesn’t mean I won’t enjoy being around them again. In the time since I left, it seems like a lot’s happened and yet, at the same time, nothing has. A few, I’m told, are still sticking it out in the *cough*Hell*cough* ABU account. Some, I guess, enjoy it to a degree or aren’t completely disgusted with it. Others I know are just giving it a year to get promoted to a position they want before they decide to move on. After all, they practically promised us that we’d be up for promotion real soon. As for the ones that left, I don’t have as much contact with them as I’d like. One of them is in Convergys, another went back to her studies, another probably decided he was better off employed back in Japan and the others each found their own little niche in the world. So, in effect, that just leaves me as the one who hasn’t found his place in the world yet.

As for Grace (my closest friend back there), I think she’s finally gotten some measure of the happiness I always thought she deserved. According to her, she has a boyfriend now and it just so happened to be Lei, another ABU dude. While I would never have imagined it, now that I think about it, there really isn’t anything in either of their personalities that wouldn’t mix well with the other’s. I think those two aren’t the stereotypical perfect match but they mix real well with one another and I think he’d be good for her and to her. He knows that she can handle herself if he isn’t and he knows I’ve got her back, just in case. Though I’m pretty sure she won’t need me for anything other than during those odd moments where she’ll be drunk or being overly contemplative and she needs a serious answer to some sort of strange question that most people wouldn’t bother giving a second thought to, let alone answering. Then again, that’s what makes me a different sort of friend, as someone once put it.

Moving along, I’ve recently started re-playing Final Fantasy VIII. This time, I’ve decided to take the time to fully customize everything. I nuked all the Elemental Attack Junctions since they’re ultimately more of an annoyance than an aid. I dug up as many of the stat-raising items as I could to build their stats to insane levels. I actually bothered to level all characters and GFs to 100. I never thought it possible that Cactuar could go beyond the 9999 damage cap at that level. It took a lot longer than usual but I finally managed to get them all to how I want them to be, right down to the Angel Wing’s little used Meteor trick, not to mention the easy-to-abuse moves of Zell’s Duel limit break. Lionheart may be the most obvious but Zell can do more damage if you exploit his limit break and Rinoa…well, she took on several level 100 monsters on the Island Closest To Hell, Ultima Weapon, Omega Weapon and all forms of Ultimecia with minimal support with the trick I used, plus a Hero tossed her way. The game clearly has taken up a lot of my time but it was worth it to get the most powerful characters that FFVIII could allow, based on my style of play. That game isn’t the best Final Fantasy ever (that honor belongs to FFVI) but I don’t think it’s the worst either (for me, that has to be FFVII; thankfully, nobody reads this crap so I won’t get much fanboy hate-mail). However, I confess that it is a guilty pleasure to play through the budding love affair between Squall and Rinoa. Just wish Rinoa was the main character and not Squall though. FF seriously needs to have a strong, capable female lead again after Terra of FFVI and while Rinoa has several traits that aren’t suited for the job, she’s a better candidate than Yuna, Garnet or Tifa (Aeris doesn’t count; she’s dead). Oh well, at least FFXIII seems to fulfill my wish for one.

Of course, the whole ‘school days’ feel I get whenever I step into Balamb Garden, as well as Rinoa and all the official and fan art I have of her, sort of inspired me. Mind you, I think the whole super-powered, elite, specially-trained high school students thing is overdone, so I probably won’t steer my idea in that direction. Besides, my last story already took care of that problem. I think it is about time I got back to writing stories set in high school. It is where I started writing and frankly, it feels like home whenever I write about characters that are trapped in the educational system. But, of course, I’ll need to make some adjustments. What I’m planning likely isn’t going to do well in a setting based on the real world. No, I’ll need to make a completely original world but one that isn’t too different from the world as it is now. I’ll need to refine this idea for a bit, let it bubble in the old cauldron for a bit. Maybe try to re-think the whole ‘factions’ concept that’s been in my head for a while now. Come to think of it, I haven’t written anything even remotely critical of religion, the religious and the very concept of religion lately. I should get around to doing that.

Also, I’ve been thinking about writing ‘adult’ (that’s a misuse of the word if I ever saw one) material again, reminiscent of old Yuki’s Diary or Kasumi Inn or my old Love Hina lemon fanfiction. The adult fiction exam I had to write for the iwebmasters application of mine showed me just how rusty my pr0n writing skills are at the moment. They’re definitely in their worst state in years and while I’m not really all that intent on focusing on them, I do believe I need a little brushing up. To that end, I’ve re-read Erik Lustbader’s The Miko and Anne Rice’s Belinda to get a feel of it again; it was elements of their erotica that I tried to weave into my ‘adult’ writing anyway. I need to feel that old rush again, I guess. I’m not going to say that my creative arsenal isn’t complete without it but I certainly don’t think I can do without that. After all, sex, sexuality and related things are all aspects of a person and some traces of them should manifest in any fictional character. But as I look back, it makes me wonder how I ended up writing something so elaborately twisted as Yuki’s Diary based solely on a whim I had at the time. I’m not about to say it’s the best of its kind in the world but it isn’t as bad as one would think, I believe. If nothing else, straight guys and a few straight girls love it. Maybe it’s just because you can’t help but admire a hot girl who’s rather open about how she likes things. Admittedly, Yuki wasn’t anywhere near the sexual huntress that I’d originally planned her to be, though I may still get my chance in my next project.

Maybe something sci-fi-ish. Or perhaps something more along the supernatural. Part of me isn’t about to go into high fantasy akin to Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings or something Dungeons and Dragons-ish and I firmly believe that Rowling’s Harry Potter books are just more nails into the coffin of the dying fantasy genre. However, if more fantasy stories are styled after D&D: Ravenloft, that’s different. Aside from Ravenloft official fiction and fanfiction, I’m not aware of any fantasy fiction that carries elements of gothic horror so heavily or so well. As it stands, far too much of the fantasy genre has become stereotypical and unimaginative in the way it portrays elves, gnomes, orcs and the like; it’s tall ripped off from Tolkien now. Even Ravenloft does that, in those rare domains that have elves as a major chunk of the population. But I’ll save more on these thoughts for another time. For now, as part of my post-Akatsuki plans, I think I’ll revisit an old idea of mine that sort of took off but didn’t get very far for various reasons the first time around. Sadly, I can only recall the general idea of it and a few character details but none of the actual text. I’m sure I can find it on the internet somewhere but I’m too lazy to look, so I’ll have to just re-tool it.

That’s all for now. I had better get back to…whatever it is I’m doing right now.

And on a random note, the new thing Blogger seems to be trying out is pissing me off…it insists on logging me in using my Google ID but even though I do have that, when I registered with Blogger I used my Yahoo ID. Now, I don’t know if anyone else had that same problem or if my logging in with the right ID to post this was a fluke but it is rather annoying. I have the same ID name on Blogger, Google and Yahoo and it does get frustrating trying to tell Blogger’s system that I used Yahoo with them and not Google. It insisted on logging me in using Google, which meant that I didn’t have a blog set up yet. And for some insane reason, I can’t get into Blogger with my old ID and Yahoo account, the bastards. That resulted in the delay of this post.

Anyway, time to go do...stuff.

Monday, August 14, 2006

First Thoughts: EduNara

First Thoughts: EduNara

Let’s see…

I am sure this isn’t the company for me and not the job for me. Now, I confess I haven’t even started actually working yet but just from the orientation alone, I already have a bad feeling of where this is going. And frankly, I don’t like it. Now, maybe I just need to go through a few days worth of training, get a feel for things and then I might change my mind. Still, I haven’t had this strong a disinclination towards a company ever. That might be due to the fact that Koreans are running this show and not Americans or Filipinos, which means things are different from how I’m used to things. Different captain, different way of running the ship into the ground. Still, there is an air of…something that I don’t like about the place.

Now, I liked my co-workers back in Ambergris. A lot of good people there, though a lot of them have already left the company by this point. And frankly, I have a feeling I won’t like the people at my new job as much. Besides, some of my friends there are incredibly unique and I really enjoyed my time with them. The people I’ve seen here don’t seem to be as easy to get along with as the ones I worked with in the past. Still, you have to get along and you have to learn to make due with who you’re with and what you have. It isn’t a concept that’s entirely alien to me but I’m not about to admit liking the idea. Well, what can I do? I left and frankly, I’m not sorry that I left. I wasn’t fond of the work, the account or the company so I went and left. Not that I disliked the co-workers. As I’ve said, I rather miss them.

Seriously. I’m really not very sure I made the right decision in switching employment to EduNara. My instincts don’t really tell me much most of the time but I guess I’ll give it about a month (which is the training period). Once I see the contract and I have a feel for what the work and the co-workers are like, then we can really get to reconsidering. But as for now, I really am not feeling this new job. Sure, a lot of things there take a bit of getting used to and that’s the case for any job but…well, something just doesn’t feel right. And this isn’t just a case of first day jitters either. I’ve had a bad feeling about this place since the day I walked in and handed in my résumé. And that just tells me that I’m not going to like it there very much.

But at least if I can last long enough to actually buy one of the things on my ‘To Buy’ list, I’ll have gotten something out of the deal.

Now, moving on to a little torture. Good old Akatsuki was originally drastically different story…

The main change was the shift from a weird shojo-ai romance story with both of the main characters having some degree of mental deficiency or a form of mental illness. It wasn’t supposed to have all of those semi-science fiction based powers that they ended up having. The supporting cast also should have had a lot more male characters since Seven Angels wasn’t designed as an all-female school. Now, none of the characters really changed all that much in terms of appearance but Kibagami Hodaka wasn’t supposed to be the almost insane character that she came out as. However, that’s for later. For now, let’s focus on the changes to Seven Angels first, shall we? You know, that isn’t really an option if you’re reading this.

For one thing, the ‘group’ Miho is part of, the Aristocracy, was supposed to just one of many groups of students in Seven Angels and was originally called the House of Dominations. Each House was supposed to have a representative called an Aristocrat and the student council, which consisted of the nine Aristocrats, was intended to be the Aristocracy. As stated, the school was originally intended to have male and female students. There were supposed to be kendo matches that served as bouts of honor between 2 people who had an argument. Now, moving on to changed characters.

First off, Miho and Yuki. The dynamic between these two was to be drastically different from what happened to end up in the story. First off, Yuki was the original body and Miho an alternate personality, Yuki having a mild case of paranoid schizophrenia. Also, Yuki was meant to be straight and pursued Tachibana Kurei, wanting him to be her boyfriend. Miho, however, is an avowed lesbian and her pursuit of Kanako was retained. In the end, Miho won out because Yuki realized that despite her not being real, Miho did have real feelings for Kanako and she backed down, let the other personality take full control.

Kanako changed drastically. She didn’t change appearance-wise but she wasn’t going to be such a morbid artist either. Her original persona was meant to be flamboyant, creative. She was supposed to be an elegant anarchist. Her art was originally meant to reflect a more anti-authority, chaotic view of things. She was more against society and the government, as well as a firm believer of a complex network of conspiracy theories involving the Jewish Banking Cabal, the KGB, the Catholic Church, the US government, OPEC, the Ku Klux Klan, the Global Conspiracy of the Bald and the Free Masons. She sounded deranged but at some point, she was actually going to successfully expose the Japanese cell of the Global Conspiracy of the Bald, of which Celia Foxfire should have been a part of. Yes, that means Celia Foxfire was supposed to be bald and no, she wasn’t supposed to die.

Akira and Fuko weren’t supposed to become major characters. They were supposed to have been dead even before the story started. Tsubame was supposed to have been Yuki’s twin sister who liked to practice kissing and foreplay with her twin. Her girlfriend was supposed to be Kibagami Hodaka, who had a kid sister named Rinka and a kid brother named Koganei who both had an infatuation with Sawamura Kyo, Tsubame’s boyfriend.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Author's Note 2

This is Author's Note for Chapter 2, Part 3

Minor update, really. Akatsuki is completed at last. While it doesn’t reflect so on Fictionpress, the fact is that it has been turned into a PDF, effectively ending it for me. Will continue to update it on my account at whatever pace I choose to.

To be honest, I don’t really think much of Akatsuki. It is a nice piece and all but it isn’t anything more for me than an exercise in getting my fiction-writing muscles flexed. I needed to get back in the swing of things, so to speak, and I think it did the job. That would essentially explain the haphazard nature of the plot, characters and structure of it, really. Not that it’s an excuse but I have to admit, I wasn’t really focusing on it while I was writing it.

Anyway, in a future post I’ll create a character-by-character analysis of the story. I do that for everything I write but, for reasons I don’t really understand, I never bother to let anyone else see it. I think it best to change that, starting with this piece. And no, this decision is not retroactive.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Author’s Note 1

Author’s Note for Chapter 1, Part 3 (and also covering any previous Chapter 1 Parts)

Wow. It has been a long, long while since I last wrote anything that even neared the halfway point in terms of actual completion. Granted, it isn’t up to what I thought it’d be but for someone who hasn’t been in full form for almost a year and a half, I don’t think it’s that bad.
Plot-wise, I really think this whole thing is a little sparse. There’s hardly anything solid in it and the narrative doesn’t flow as well as it should. I haven’t gotten back my old talent at including generous levels of background detail down to what the place smells like either. Damn it, I’ve got a lot of work to do and I really need to get back in top form. Hopefully, the project after this (once I manage to assemble all the needed background details, that is) will see me back the way I normally am when creating.
Now, the title (Akatsuki) is ‘dawn’ in Japanese. Yes, I did rip it off of the ORB-01 Akatsuki Gundam from Gundam Seed Destiny. I didn’t particularly like that Gundam (or GSD as a whole, for that matter but at least it is infinitely superior to crap like Wing or G) and I really, really dislike Cagalli (I really like Lunamaria and Meyrin more) but there is an in-story reason for the title. That’ll be revealed later on. I also have a personal reason for the title. Namely, I feel like I’ve been in a long creative lull and this, despite all the flaws I’ve seen and others have seen in it, this is a representation to me of my getting out of that lull and firing on all cylinders again. Besides, it was either that or satsujin but I decided to save satsujin for another story later on.
Now, to be honest, the sci-fi and conspiracy elements in this weren’t even supposed ot be here. This was supposed to be one of those straight-laced shojo-ai romances that I’ve always said I’d write with alarming frequency – until I was convinced to play Galerians: Ash and Parasite Eve again, which is to blame for all of the twisted and pseudo-supernatural abilities in this story.
Anyway, that’s my note for the time being. If I have anything to say that’s pertinent to Akatsuki or any future projects I’m considering, this’ll be the place to check out.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Chapter 1, Part 3

You know, life re-he-he-he-heally sucks.
I am still sadly unemployed, though I actually am looking for a damn job. I’ve been watching Jerry Springer, Dr. Phil and Maury a lot recently; more than is good for my mental ill-health. I’ve also managed to rediscover Babylon 5, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and Galaxy Angel (ah, sweet, sweet Galaxy Angel. How could I ever have made the mistake of forgetting about you?) Hell, even Power Rangers: Dino Thunder, Drawn Together and the various Law & Order series have made their way into my TV diet. And on top of that, I’m still watching the usual shows (Gundam Seed Destiny, That ’70s Show, Jeopardy, Mythbusters, etc.) and I’m working on 2 projects.
The first one, Akatsuki, is about…halfway through and half of the first chapter is already up for people who got lost to read if they have the time to spare and their insomnia is that bad. I’m not sure Akatsuki is going to make it to Fictionpress.com yet. The other one is still in pre-production since I still haven’t finished making the cast for it yet. About the only character I’ve decided upon right now is Captain Mackenzie Slade, the feisty, hot young sharpshooter captain of an as-of-yet-unnamed ship. That one will probably end up on Fictionpress.com and here. You know, as Akatsuki keeps going, it seems less and less weird sci-fi/shojo (like I envisioned it) and more like some sort of twisted, warped modern fantasy. Yet, the untitled second project of mine is decidedly more action/sci-fi than anything else, though one of the potential characters is a telekinetic.
The sad part is that I actually have regrets over leaving my last job at Ambergris. Not because I miss the work and not even because I miss the people. It all boils down to the fact that I miss a specific person in Ambergris. Now, I will admit I made some good friends there, like the trainers (Sarge) Joma and Martin, along with the people in my batch. Now, I can understand why I should miss a certain girl there a lot more than the others mainly because she was the one person there I felt I really became close to. She was, in my own words, the closest friend I’ve had in years. However, what makes me worry is that she’s the only one I miss. I miss her and with her birthday coming up, I’m hammering out whatever ideas I have to get a gift for her but with no money, that isn’t easy. Still, I can at least greet her and wish her well even if I might have pissed her off a bit the last time we talked, right? Sometimes I wish I didn’t have such a damn big mouth. The emotional field is to me what Waterloo was to Napoleon; I got caught poorly prepared and facing a defensive master (Wellington, if we continue the Waterloo analogy) in a battlefield that favors defense and I’m more oriented towards offense (in a way, that makes me Napoleon). I think defeat is a foregone conclusion for me in this one…
Well, enough about my problems. We move on now to the next part of Akatsuki.
Side Note:
While waiting for Blogger to load, I decided to upload this story to Fictionpress. Link here:
http://www.fictionpress.com/read.php?storyid=2224193

Chapter 1, Part 3:
Yagami Fuko stood with her back to the wind. She put down her bags for a moment and then took a moment to gather her thoughts. She wasn’t so sure about studying in Seven Angels but her close friend, Tohya Akira, had insisted that she do so. Fuko felt the wind grow stronger as it began to blow past her hair. The short, Catholic school girl skirt she was wearing started to fly around a bit in the wind as she considered things. She was just lucky that there wasn’t anyone around to see it happen. Not that she wasn’t capable of taking care of any fool that was too touchy. She picked up her bags again and proceeded to walk past the open gates. She had hoped to get a fresh start in Seven Angels, far from the secret of her past. She smiled. She was positive that, aside from her friend, there were no pieces of her past that lingered about the halls of the school. She was certain Akira would have warned her about them if she knew about them. Of course, Fuko realized that Akira may not have had familiarity with certain other elements of her past. Still, the chance of her past having caught up to her in that place was highly unlikely. With a deep breath, she decided to find Akira, settle into the place and hope for the best. She hoped to never have to be put into the situation that forced her to relive her dark high school days. In her heart, she hoped that she’d left those times behind her and moved on. She longed to. Sadly, she hadn’t even walked fifteen feet into the place before she saw someone that ruined the day for her and made her weak in the knees. She saw Kazama Yuki.
The two of them had history with one another that Fuko would rather have forgotten. Fuko clenched her fists and prepared for any possibility but she was certain it wouldn’t end in any sort of physical confrontation. Experience with Yuki’s preferred tactics taught her that. She looked at the masked girl and trembled. She knew the whole truth about Yuki and the nature of the games she played. She knew exactly what Yuki was capable of because it was Yuki who taught her how to fully tap into what she was capable of. She kept a good distance between the two of them and cautiously, she looked around to see if there were any other people around. She wanted to make sure she was safe from any sort of ambush as well as make sure that there weren’t going to be any witnesses if she managed to work up the nerve to do what had to have been done years before – rid the world of Kazama Yuki.
It was something that had to be done from the moment Yuki’s powers came into full view when Akatsuki ended. The two of them were both part of Akatsuki, though Fuko arrived on the scene later than Yuki did. She watched Miho and Yuki there and became close friends with Miho but she never trusted the twin. Even before the changes that she went through as a part of Akatsuki, changes that all of the girls involved experienced, Yuki had already shown a darker side to her, a domineering nature over her twin sister. Fuko understood well enough that Yuki was capable of anything given the appropriate motivation, though there was a dislike for being personally involved in physical confrontation. It was a contrast that she had with Fuko, who was more than willing to slip into a fight when the situation called for it. Something twisted was unleashed at that time; something that Fuko understood had to be stopped before it became too powerful. She’d experienced first-hand what Yuki was capable of, even if she was an inferior fighter in the physical arena. She wasn’t someone to be trifled with. None of those that were part of Akatsuki were to be trifled with but Fuko understood more than most that Yuki had potential to be far more dangerous.
“Yuki.” Fuko muttered to herself. “She’s here?”
Why yes. Fuko heard the response in her mind. I am.
“How long has it been, Yagami? Two? Two and a half years?”
Fuko frowned. “Not nearly long enough.”
“Oh come now. We’re old friends, aren’t we?”
“Miho and I were friends. Notice the past tense, Yuki.”
“Nonsense. You know the truth about my twin and I don’t you?” Yuki answered before she took a seat on a bench and beckoned Fuko to come closer to her. Besides, you and I were once close allies.
“You were in my head! You manipulated me, you manipulated Shizuka and you manipulated Yumi and all the rest!” Fuko objected as a rather sizable rock lifted up from the ground. She took a single step back as her rage began to build stronger. “You never gave us any choice in the matter.”
“Never gave you any choice? Don’t fool yourself, Yagami!” Yuki laughed as she brushed off the hilarity she found in Fuko’s statement. I never manipulated any of you. You all listened to me, joined me in my cause of your own volition. “All that you and the others needed was for me to come and convince you.”
“You’re insane. We never wanted to be accomplices to murder!” Fuko cried out as she placed herself into a fighting stance, the levitating rock still in the air.
Accomplices? You fool! Have you taken a knock on your head recently or have the physical stresses of your abilities finally ruined your fragile mind? Yuki laughed again as Fuko’s rage grew. “You did all the killing. Or don’t you recall? You killed them. You and Shizuka and Yumi and Miyu. As I recall, even your dearest friend had a hand in those deaths.” You have to admit, we ended Akatsuki with a bang.
Fuko fell silent and the stone dropped. She reeled back. Did you break your concentration? She clenched her fists even tighter while she closed her eyes. “You made us. You drove us to kill them.”
“I did no such thing. What you did to those people, you did on your own. Besides, I offered you and the others a reprieve from the guilt a long time ago.” Yuki said as she stood up and proceeded to walk away. She waved her hand as she walked, to show Fuko she considered the conversation over. “Only one of you took it. I guess, in a way, she was the smart one among you. She’s happy now. No memories of Akatsuki, no nightmares about those grisly murders. Had you taken it, I’m sure we could become close.”
“With or without my memories of Akatsuki, I wouldn’t trust you.”
So much rage. So much hatred. I wonder though, do you realize that I can do to you what I did to her at any time now? I’m sure you’ve gotten better at your ability as I have mine. Yuki turned her head just a little, enough for Fuko to see her smile. “I don’t need physical contact to re-write your memories now.”
She reeled back and then her nerve failed her. Fuko couldn’t go through with what had to be done.
I’ll be seeing you around. Yuki walked away, aware Fuko was unable to stop her. And her too. “By the way, I just thought of this and it is a little late for it but whatever happened to the others?” I know you’re here and the girl you spent a lot of time with is here somewhere too.
Fuko took a seat on a bench herself. It was the chance that she’d hoped to have but she failed at it dismally. She lost her nerve at the critical moment and Yuki was left alive to cause havoc once more. She’d let her go even though she had the perfect opportunity and she was sure that there was no way to implicate her in Yuki’s death if she had gone through. She knew terrible things were going to happen and she blamed herself for all of them. She stood up and tried to get the incident out of her mind. She was there and she had some idea of what Yuki was capable of and how she liked to operate. She could at least prevent the things from happening. It was a cold comfort but it was all she had at the time. She needed to find Akira.
The event known as Akatsuki changed her life, Yuki’s life and the lives of countless others. And, under Yuki’s guidance, words and encouragement, she and a handful of others ended Akatsuki with violence. Try as she might, she could never forget what had happened to her because of it. It had different effects for each of the girls that were lined up for it; Yuki was given mental abilities beyond those of normal humans and Fuko learned she had the ability to lift and move objects through sheer force of will. It was an ability she honed over time and has become more and more flexible since she first discovered it. She tried to lessen the use of it since the incident that she helped Yuki orchestrate and the rare instances when she used it involved total secrecy and no one was harmed. She had enough blood on her hands already. However, it was no secret, even to her, that she loved her ability and she was unable to let it go. She practiced with it as often as she could even though she knew that she had more power than she had let herself tap into. However, she feared that if she allowed herself to come to master her abilities, to maximize the power that it could offer her, she might become as corrupted as Yuki. The temptation to embrace her dark side and her powers was always great but she always had the specter of Yuki to remind her not to succumb to such thoughts. Inside her, she wondered if she could ever atone for all she had done; wash the blood from her hands. She was a killer, of that there was no doubt, but she was not a monster.
Fuko had a lot of blood on her hands. She’d taken lives that fateful night that ended Akatsuki. She’d crushed their hearts as they beat in their chests. She’d choked them slowly and watched as they squirmed and begged. She’d thrown them across rooms and into whatever lethal thing she could find and when she had nothing to work with, she threw them around until the impact slowly hammered them to death. The most horrifying part of it for her was that she enjoyed it. She enjoyed it more than any of the others, taking a sadistic glee as she watched her victims beg and plead during the few chances that she allowed them to. And then, as it dawned on her what a monster she had allowed herself to become, the monster she let Yuki awaken and use as a mindless killer, she wasn’t done yet. For several months afterwards, she realized that she had to rid the world of the monsters like herself, the terrors that came forth from Akatsuki. She hunted down the others that were involved in that slaughter. She tracked them down and killed them, her mind set on ridding the world of monsters like Yuki. In those instances too she found pleasure in killing them. She took a twisted enjoyment in stalking them and eventually ending their lives. She watched them turn into monstrous murderers, their powers had been misused. Yuki had evaded her hunt and she left only one other participant alive, mainly because she couldn’t remember who it was. She suspected she’d have to beat it out of Yuki when the time came. It was natural to assume that Yuki had done some sort of memory alteration since she was the only telepath that Akatsuki produced, outside of Miho, and Yuki was the stronger twin, by far. As for herself, she couldn’t die until she’d rid the world of the super-powered products of Akatsuki. Then, and only then, would she end her own life.
Fuko walked around until she caught sight of Tohya Akira, her old friend and someone she secretly loved. Tohya Akira was lovely beyond words to Fuko, though she could never work up the courage to admit it. Her short, solid black hair was cut just above the shoulders, neatly combed and seemed to go back into place after it was tussled or bounced. Her skin was fair, not as creamy or milky as most but it had a silkiness to it that seemed to give an impression of white rosebuds. She had a frail-looking figure but she was stronger than she looked, Fuko knew. She was nimble, slightly more flexible than other girls her age, a brighter light bulb than most as well and, from what she was told recently, Akira also started to refresh her skills in wing chun and jiu-jitsu. She stood there dressed in her usual attire: baggy fatigues, a pair of black leather boots, black tank top and a biker’s black leather jacket, complete with a pair of leather gloves that had red knuckles and a flaming skull emblem on the back of the jacket. Akira looked a lot like a tomboy in her get-up and that was the exact image she wanted to convey to others. She turned to see Fuko and smiled.
The two were old friends and Fuko’s memories of Akira reached too far back for Yuki to have had a hand in their creation. Besides, as intelligent and as cunning as Yuki was, even she didn’t have the kind of power needed to actually create a human being from scratch and force the world to accept her existence. It would have been foolish of Yuki to have tried, especially after what had happened to the third Kazama girl, Yuki and Miho’s younger sister Tsubame – who had infinitely more power than Yuki did, though she lost her life due to the excessive strains she put on her mind and body when she attempted to create an actual human being. As arrogant as Yuki was, she wasn’t foolish enough to attempt that. That, of course, was the reasoning Fuko used to assure herself Yuki wasn’t involved in any way with her closeness to Akira.
The two of them had a long history with one another, even though Akira was two years older than Fuko. Both of them recalled having met at some point early in their childhood years but neither one of them really knew how it happened. Akira was fairly certain it happened in the Tohya family’s Fukuoka mansion but Fuko felt that wasn’t completely correct. Akira had always convinced her parents to make arrangements such that Fuko was in the same school as her and the two spent as much time together as they could. Fuko, at times, vaguely mentioned that she recalled a third girl with them but couldn’t quite remember the name or what the girl looked like. Akira, for her part, claimed to have no recollection of that third girl. Akira had decided to learn martial arts sooner than Fuko did but the latter learned much faster, having had experience in fighting on the streets during the summers – things that Fuko preferred not to inform Akira of. The two of them had sparred often and exchanged points of view on a number of things at the same time; their talks ranged from the existence of destiny and free will, the purpose of meaning – which the two of them came to create a rather unusual answer for – and why chicken does seem to taste like everything. Fuko recalled that she spent hardly any time in any of the Tohya family’s mansions but she recalled Akira spent much time in the Yagami family home. It was when the Tohya family left for Italy that Fuko was drawn into Akatsuki and Akira developed her interest in motorcycles. That was comforting for Fuko since had Akira remained in Japan, she would likely have been drawn into the horror that was Akatsuki as well.
Akira’s eyes reflected Fuko’s appearance and the contrasts between them. Whereas Akira looked as if she was some sort of rebel, Fuko looked far more subdued, more clichéd. She wore a school uniform and it was easily the most noticeable thing about her – Fuko had the odd habit of wearing cosplay school uniforms wherever she went and aside from a purple and red kimono at her home in Fukuoka, a gown for formal events and several tomboyish ensembles Akira gave her, that consisted her entire wardrobe. Fuko had a very feminine, very delicate way of walking and, combined with the school uniforms, gave others an impression of poise. Her hair was an unusual variant of chestnut brown; she had a boyish haircut but had a few loose strands on the side and front to ‘add a little extra spice’, as she once put it. Her eyes were rather striking since the right eye was hazel while the left one had a mix of green and blue. Fuko said that it was some sort of genetic fluke or anomaly but neither of them really did the research to confirm that claim. She was built more muscular than the average Japanese girl but she was still feminine, still shapely and, despite her misgivings about their size, she had larger breasts than average. In reality, she was far more attractive than the average girl but something about her presence, her aura downplayed it all. In some ways, Akira assumed that Fuko actually liked things that way, though she also noted that she wasn’t afraid to use her sex appeal as a means of getting things that she wouldn’t likely have gotten otherwise.
That always made Akira smile.
“Hey, girl. You look a little off there, anything wrong?” Akira asked as Fuko approached.
“Nah, just had a run-in with something unpleasant, that’s all. No big thing.”
Akira smiled as she took one of Fuko’s bags. “Well, let’s get you settled in. I had you set up in the same dorm room as me. Thankfully, my old roommate, Tsubame, graduated already.”
“So,” she began as she stepped into the room. “Akira, anything about this place I should know?”
“I’ll fill you in on all the resident personalities a little later. Right now, I want to get you settled in so I can give you the grand tour of this place.” Akira answered. “And get a little sparring time in.”
“Yeah.” Fuko nodded. “I missed our sparring sessions too. A lot of fun. Very enlightening.”
“Remember our purpose of meaning bit? I think that was a classic.”
“I think it was along the lines of ‘the purpose of meaning is to continually seek the purpose of meaning’ or something like that.” Fuko thought as she closed the dorm door behind her. She felt as if a great load had been taken off her shoulders, just by being in Akira’s presence. “We were fifteen at the time. My memory of it is a bit hazy but I remember the two of us believing it made perfect sense at the time.”
Akira raised an eyebrow. “Well, it does!”
Fuko sighed. “You never change. You never change.”
The two then shared a laugh as they talked of the old times.
The calm before the storm, little Yagami. Fuko felt a cold chill as she heard it in her mind.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Chapter 1, Part 2

Chapter 1, Part 2:
The girl was clearly not Japanese, even when seen from a distance. Her hair reached about three inches past her nimble shoulders; the color was a dark, reddish shade of brown with a few white streaks here and there. She was taller than most and her preference for high-heeled shoes only served to make her appear taller. In terms of her body, she was a little thin for her size but her figure was filled out, very seductive. She had the almost perfect hourglass figure that she’d wanted; her chest was easily three cup sizes bigger than anyone else and about a cup size bigger than a girl her age. She had a nice, light bronze tan that made her stand out; which she liked since it set her apart from the Japanese girls but she disliked it as well because it made it much harder for her to engage in her hobby as well as to blend in whenever she thought she wanted to. But she was disinclined to make any effort to blend in more. She adjusted her crimson-tinted sunglasses as she took in a deep breath and took her mug of hot chocolate as she stepped out of her dorm room. As she did, she passed by a window and saw her reflection. She took a look at herself and then tossed her hair back.
“Celia Foxfire, you are an absolute goddess.” she said to herself before moving on.
Celia, one of the few gaijin students in Seven Angels, took a good, long sip of her hot chocolate as she looked out the window of the fourth floor of the school’s main building. She’d spent quite a bit of her time as an observer of the school’s prominent students. There were the obvious subjects, the seven girls that made up the powerful and beautiful student council, but there were also the other, less obvious ones. There was Tachibana Rinka, the captain of both the karate and aikido teams as well as a confirmed lesbian, having had two girlfriends in the school since her freshman year – and according to rumor, more than a few flings as well. There was also the enigmatic Kirisawa Kanako but Celia was put off early on by the fact that she couldn’t figure the girl out and eventually gave up on it. Of course, she could have gone on and watched Kibagami Hodaka, the known street fighting delinquent, a pretty face and the school’s most prominent heartthrob. However, for all the interesting people she could have watched, she found that the one that caught her interest the most was the twin of one of the student council members: Kazama Yuki.
Kazama Yuki was a terrifying young girl. She was as physically imposing as her twin sister Miho was; that meant she wasn’t imposing at all. Indeed, Celia didn’t note much divergence between the two in terms of physical appearance. Both had long legs, slender bodies, their figures were shapely but hadn’t yet filled out completely and Celia considered them to have small breasts, even for Japanese girls. Both of them had the same dark brown hair cut past the shoulders, almost to the waist but Miho preferred to tie her hair in a single ponytail while Yuki kept hers free with several strands over the forehead. Both of them had the same light skin tone, which she thought to be a little unusual. One of the differences Celia took note of was the fact that Miho walked with a grace and nobility befitting someone of regal bearing but in contrast, Yuki walked with a street-wise roughness, a lack of pretentious poise or aristocratic flair. There was a short list of differences on the physical level that Celia noted but the most prominent one was the mask on Yuki’s face. It was made of tempered steel painted with the left half white and the right black, the design was similar to the yin and yang symbol. The reason behind the mask was that Yuki had suffered severe facial burns as a child and they had never actually healed, so to hide the disfigurement, the mask was given to her by her family. According to some, it was at Miho’s request, while to others Yuki actually designed the mask on her own before she had it made. Only Yuki’s eyes and pale pinkish lips were visible, the same chestnut brown eyes that Miho had but Yuki’s had a fierce, primal ferocity to them that wasn’t right, a contrast to her twin’s eyes of curious innocence and sincere warmth. There was something in those eyes that Celia didn’t trust, that Celia couldn’t trust. For some reason, she reminded Celia of Adolph Hitler.
That was exactly the reason why Celia wanted to observe her, she thought to herself as she walked around the halls alone. She hoped not to see any of the few other students already there as she walked. She was almost completely alone but she knew that there were other students already there, namely: Kirisawa, the Kazama twins, Kibagami, Tachibana and a new girl that she only saw but didn’t get a chance to speak to. There were likely others but she was far from interested in them. As she kept moving, she saw Miho walking out of the library from the other building. She had spotted Kirisawa walk out a few minutes before and she thought the reclusive artist looked rather flustered. She wasn’t sure of that but somehow, she was sure Miho was responsible for it. The reasons behind it weren’t even the slightest bit fathomable for her. Celia let her mind toy with a few possibilities on that based on what she knew on the two but that only gave her about a minute and a half worth of distraction. It was an interesting angle, that there was a chance that one of the social elite of Seven Angels was somehow involved with an outcast, an example of the bottom of the barrel. She had a feeling it was somehow connected to Yuki but she had no idea how. She smiled as she decided to take a course of action on the matter. Then she laughed. Or more appropriately, she cackled.
She decided to keep moving. As she walked, every so often she’d stop to admire herself in the window. Apart from observing other girls, Celia often caught herself enamored by her own appearance. It would have been dishonest of her to call it anything other than what it was: a touch of narcissism. She had good reason to think highly of herself. She was beautiful, she was intelligent, she was rich and she was also a talented singer, though she kept that to herself for the most part. She wasn’t self-obsessed, however. She disliked praise coming from others as she felt them shallow, the ones giving them uneducated and had little to no awareness of what the proper standard should be. Nonetheless, she could get along with anyone with ease and she could adapt her mindset to suit a given person or conversation even though she always kept to herself the complex criticisms and prejudices she had towards other beliefs and mindsets.
She made her way to the ground level and she was in a position that allowed her to have a clear view of the courtyard but at the same time, she could hide behind one of the pillars to mask her presence. It was from that vantage point that she managed to see something interesting.
Kibagami Hodaka and Kazama Yuki were both seated on a bench and, despite the distance, it was clear to Celia that the two of them were holding hands. She was too far to tell what the two of them were talking about or if they were talking at all but the scene certainly threw Celia off. Yuki was a terrifying and dangerous person, as far as Celia was concerned, but she’d never considered that she had any involvement with the delinquent Kibagami. For a moment, it seemed as if Kibagami had moved in to kiss Yuki or to at least remove the mask but Yuki brushed her away. It was hard to tell what Kibagami’s facial expression was at that moment but she didn’t move very much from Yuki’s position. It was also notable that the girl in the mask had changed the direction she was looking; her head looked over to her right. Celia felt as if the masked girl was looking for something or waiting for something. She was tempted to move closer but she’d decided against it when she considered that doing so might reveal her presence. It was then that Yuki stood up and said something to Kibagami before the masked girl proceeded to walk away, leaving the delinquent heartthrob on the bench alone to contemplate whatever had gone on between them. Celia decided it was time to leave a few minutes afterwards. There didn’t seem to be anything else left to see between the two and her hot chocolate, though only half-finished, had already gone cold. As she turned a corner, she froze.
“You were watching, weren’t you, gaijin?” It was Yuki.
She’d come out of nowhere to suddenly just come in front of Celia. She’d never been that close to Yuki before and she felt some sort of power that shook her to her core. “Watching what?”
“Don’t lie to me, gaijin. I know you were watching.” Yuki countered as she came closer, using the intimidating fire in her eyes and her own body to gently pin Celia to the wall. “I am not a fool.”
“I really don’t…” Celia gasped as Yuki drew her face closer to hers; the metallic surface of the mask almost touched her skin. She also felt Yuki’s hands forcefully pin her wrists to the wall.
“I truly, truly dislike dishonesty, gaijin. Now tell me honestly,” Yuki said. Her voice was warm and melodic but Celia couldn’t shake her fears as her heart beat madly. “were you watching?”
“You already know the answer to that…”
“True. But I do so value honesty. Now, answer my question.”
Celia gulped as her heart raced. Yuki drew her face even closer to hers and the cold metal mask on her skin made it worse. She felt she had no other choice but to answer. “Yes.”
Yuki suddenly drew back with a cold smile. She wasn’t quite done with Celia yet. And that realization made Celia feel uneasy – to say the least. “How good of you to answer me with honesty. Now, on to other business.” Yuki reached into the pocket of her jacket and pulled out a lighter. She lit it close to Celia’s face; the flickering flame almost touched the gaijin again. “I am quite aware of your habit of watching others. Do not deny it. I would be so disappointed if you did. We simply must speak on it.”
“No problem…”
“I want you to understand that you can do it but you have…limitations. You have to be aware that certain people are off limits. And you must have it in you, the kindness and understanding I mean, to see that both I and my sister are not to be disturbed by your intrusions.” Yuki said. She spoke as if she was explaining things patiently to a fool. “I do hope I’ve made my request perfectly clear. Have I?”
“As day…” she answered nervously.
Yuki smiled as she gave Celia her personal space. “Excellent.”
As Yuki left, she had a malignant smile on her face. She was sure that Celia wasn’t going to watch her or Miho anymore and that meant she was free to pursue her objectives. She had taken certain measures to ensure it. She entered the dorm room she shared with her twin sister and locked the door behind her. Miho was already inside, quiet and on her knees; her face betrayed her subservience to Yuki. As she stepped into her dorm room, she got the lighter to start the flame anew. She stared into the flame and watched it dance slowly. She stared at it intently, her mind focused solely on it. She continued that way for several minutes until she gave up on whatever it was she was intent on doing. She put it back into her purse as she took a seat. She looked out the window and watched Kanako as she sat alone while she was at work again at something on her tablet PC. Yuki simply looked down as she slowly slipped the mask from her face while her twin, Miho, closed the curtains. Yuki felt that they had much to talk about. She was sure Miho felt that way for a long time already but she never cared about her twin sister’s feelings much for the most part. As far as Yuki was concerned, Miho was merely a tool to be used and discarded at her convenience. It was only fortunate for Miho that Yuki had need of her for the time being.
The two of them had a secret that had dark ramifications. The relationship between the two was one of dominance and subservience. Yuki controlled Miho. There was little way around it: Yuki was seen as the near-absolute master of Miho’s life. Her nature as a physically imposing and dominating woman had been formed and, essentially, fed by Miho’s over-all willingness to kowtow to Yuki’s demands. However, in recent days, as Miho’s obsession with Kanako slowly grew, Yuki had noticed the slight increase in what she saw as defiance of her orders coming from her lesser twin. It was something that she’d long feared as she always knew Miho was capable of far more than Yuki ever gave her credit for and perhaps more than what she expected. Yuki had always known that her control over her twin, her dominance was fragile in the best of circumstances from her point of view. She had noticed her own use of pain to keep control over her sister but that could only go so far. She had to find a way to either gain full control over Miho or, when it proved to be the worst case scenario in Yuki’s interpretation, she would have to rid herself of her twin.
“You…didn’t have to do that to Foxfire-san.” Miho said.
“I’ll do as I please, Miho. Besides, I didn’t do anything that would permanently damage her mind.” Yuki answered. “Are you questioning my authority?”
Miho whimpered.
“I didn’t think so.” Yuki said as she relaxed. Then, she decided it was time to scorn Miho for her failinga. “You were dismal earlier in trying to make contact with Kirisawa, you pathetic weakling.”
Miho shuddered as Yuki reached out and gripped her head, the fingers applying pressure to the right nerve endings to cause her great pain. “I…I… won’t fail again, Yuki…it hurts…”
Yuki released her. “Fine. Be fortunate that you’re more likely to get her to reveal herself than I am. It would be so much easier if I could do to her what I did with Kibagami.”
“Is…is Kibagami-san…?”
“Kibagami? Ah, you speak of the street thug.” Yuki nodded as she watched and enjoyed Miho shudder in terror with every word. “Yes. She is a product of Akatsuki, like me or Kirisawa. She will join me and she will have some use should Kirisawa prove…unwilling to see my point of view.”
“Wh-what are you planning?”
“Kibagami is quite adept at using what talents Akatsuki gave her and I know what things she is capable of. She merely needs an excuse to unleash her innate cruelty upon someone and should you fail in convincing Kirisawa, Kibagami will constitute more…unpleasant methods.” Yuki explained as she folded her fingers in front of her face. Miho seemed able to stomach the horrible scarring of her twin’s face. “I know how much you care about her, so I suggest you do not fail in convincing her to join me.”
“I…I won’t.”
Yuki raised an unconvinced eyebrow. “I so would like to believe you. But you see I have my doubts on that. You haven’t even been able to confirm what it is Kirisawa is capable of doing.”
Miho trembled. “You told me yourself what she might be.”
“That is no guarantee. I want confirmation.” Yuki paused for a moment and then smiled. “But I do understand that building trust with someone like Kirisawa can be a long process. I’m giving you as much time as you need but be warned. I know what you know, I do what you do and we both know if you are not doing what has to be done, sister. I am lenient with you but I suggest you do not trifle with me.”
“N-never, sister.” Miho muttered. “Perish the thought.”
Yuki smiled at the expression. “I should think so. We should think so.”